{"id":2437,"date":"2020-08-15T15:08:07","date_gmt":"2020-08-15T13:08:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/?p=2437"},"modified":"2021-06-30T17:20:20","modified_gmt":"2021-06-30T15:20:20","slug":"consent-02-a-few-definitions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/consent-02-a-few-definitions\/","title":{"rendered":"A few definitions"},"content":{"rendered":"
[vc_row full_width=”stretch_row_content_no_spaces”][vc_column][vc_column_text]\n

BDSM consent and negotiation guidelines<\/strong><\/h2>\n

by La quarta corda<\/strong><\/h4>\n[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text]\n

2 –\u00a0A few definitions<\/strong><\/h4>\n[\/vc_column_text][vc_single_image image=”2371″ img_size=”medium” alignment=”center”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=”stretch_row” css=”.vc_custom_1594715935987{background-color: #f7f7f7 !important;}”][vc_column][vc_column_text]\n
TABLE OF CONTENTS<\/strong><\/h5>\n
\n\n\n\n
\n
    \n
  1. Introduction<\/a><\/li>\n
  2. A few definitions<\/a><\/li>\n
  3. The negotiation vocabulary<\/a><\/li>\n
  4. Trust<\/a><\/li>\n
  5. Experience<\/a><\/li>\n
  6. When and how much to negotiate<\/a><\/li>\n
  7. Expressing our motivation and expectations<\/a><\/li>\n
  8. Presenting our desires<\/a><\/li>\n
  9. Presenting our limits<\/a><\/li>\n
  10. Safeword<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/td>\n
\n
    \n
  1. Informing about any physical problems<\/a><\/li>\n
  2. Informing about possible psychophysical, emotional and psychological problems<\/a><\/li>\n
  3. Aftercare<\/a><\/li>\n
  4. Negotiating before the session<\/a><\/li>\n
  5. Negotiating during the session<\/a><\/li>\n
  6. Feedbacks<\/a><\/li>\n
  7. When the session is over<\/a><\/li>\n
  8. Consent<\/a><\/li>\n
  9. When consent breaks<\/a><\/li>\n
  10. Conclusions<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]\n

    \"\"A FEW DEFINITIONS<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \u201cConsent\u201d<\/strong> is a shared agreement in which two (or more) persons express their positions and respect those of the partner\/s.<\/p>\n

    This agreement can lead to seeking a solution reconciling everyone\u2019s needs through a process called \u201cnegotiation\u201d<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

    We can think of negotiation as a condom: it takes very little to slip it on, but it protects very much; not using one exposes you to risk, while wearing one can become an arousing moment for the couple without compromising the magic of what they are doing. And again: if it breaks, it can cause serious problems and yet many people don\u2019t know how to roll it on, or even think they are cool by not using it.<\/p>\n

    Negotiation is neither a competition, nor a series of concession to the partner. It is not like haggling a better price when we are buying a second-hand car, but like trying to create a shared space<\/strong> where we can explore common desires together.<\/p>\n

    For this reason, negotiation doesn\u2019t end with a series of questions to ascertain our partner\u2019s preferences and limits, but it is chiefly based on one\u2019s self-knowledge and awareness<\/strong>. Negotiation is not made of demands, but of offers. It is a way of expressing ourselves, not a quiz.<\/p>\n

    This approach is different than how some people conceive of negotiation, often meant as the top bargaining with the bottom in order to be allowed to do certain practices.<\/p>\n

    The real purpose of negotiation is not just avoiding what we don\u2019t like, but also engaging in what we desire, and which we can possibly only realize through a good negotiation!<\/p>\n

    These guidelines will refer to a kind of consent that is informed and aware<\/strong>. Consent can be declined in various forms \u2013 more or less specific or \u201copen\u201d \u2013 depending on personal inclinations, experience and trust in the partner. What is important is to always ensure the respect and well-being of everyone involved.<\/p>\n

    \"\"[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=”stretch_row” css=”.vc_custom_1594715935987{background-color: #f7f7f7 !important;}”][vc_column][vc_column_text]\n\n\n\n\n
    Previous post<\/b><\/td>\nNext post<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
    \n

    \"\"<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

    1 – Introduction<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n

    		\n

    \"\"<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

    3 – The negotiation vocabulary
    \n<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    [vc_row full_width=”stretch_row_content_no_spaces”][vc_column][vc_column_text] BDSM consent and negotiation guidelines by La quarta corda [\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text] 2 –\u00a0A few…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2274,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[24,32,31],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2437","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nawame","category-negotiation","category-safety"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2437","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2437"}],"version-history":[{"count":26,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2437\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3439,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2437\/revisions\/3439"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2274"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2437"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2437"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.laquartacorda.it\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2437"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}